I dropped my husband off this morning on his way to Ontario. I sent my love and sorrow with him and his black suit.
We all know what the black suit signifies, a funeral and the loss of a loved one. I wasn’t able to work things out to go with him but I know he will express my condolences. This man was a dear friend, particularly to my husband and so it was without question that he should go.
My husband had known this man since he was a young teen and although I had met him in passing a few times we began to get together with him and his wife entirely by accident. We had gone for a walk and had somehow gotten turned around and so we ended up taking a short cut through a condo’s parking lot. It just so happened to be theirs. We ended up chatting for a few moments and made plans to get together again this time on purpose.
It was one of the best accidental meetings we have ever had. My husband had never realized just how close we lived to them and from then on we began to see them fairly regularly. As our family grew and we spent more time with them I noticed a dynamic about my husband and our friend’s relationship. There was something more to their friendship a sort of family dynamic.
I suppose in some ways having lost their son who was the same age as my husband to cancer our visits were a look into what could have been. For a few moments it was as if they were playing with their own grandchildren, seeing a child they had once known become a man. For my husband it was a chance to connect with a father-figure who he could relate to something he had never really had before.
They were very similar men, in outlook, in humor, in attitude even in looks. In each other they found a part of themselves reflected back and he was without a shadow of a doubt more than just a friend but family.
We will both miss him dearly.
