The Great Toy Divide

I had a conversation the other day with another parent about Christmas gifts.  They’re having a hard time figuring out what to buy for their son and asked me for suggestions.  Well this little boy loves to carry around a baby doll whenever given the opportunity to do so and so it’s what I suggested, a doll.

Well the stereotypical attitudes about girl toys and boy toys reared its ugly little head and the suggestion was shot down. 

It got me thinking about this gender divide in toys.  As a mother to two girls who love remote control cars, building sets and other typical “boy toys” I’ve never really given it much consideration. I’ve always bought them toys they were interested in regardless of what side of the aisle they were on.

This attitude seems to be the norm for other parents of girls as well.  While nobody seems to care one way or the other if a girl plays with so called boy toys the same isn’t true the other way around.  It’s still looked at as odd or out of character for a boy to like things which have been labeled girl.  

Some argue that girls and boys are just fundamentally different and that boys just don’t like girl toys. I’ve worked with young children for many years now and while yes girls and boys are very different what they choose to play with has nothing to do with being male or female. 

Given the opportunity children of either gender will happily play with any toy placed in front of them regardless of whether or not it is traditionally a girls or boys toy.  This gender divide concerning toys or any other subject for that matter doesn’t begin until later when they begin to learn that some things are considered feminine or masculine. It is learned. 

While we remind our girls that they can play with whatever they like and that they can do/be/accomplish anything in life we seem to be forgetting to tell the boys in our lives the same thing.

The truth of the matter is that until we make it acceptable for a boy to play with dolls and in the kitchen that both sexes will suffer from those stereotypes perpetuating into adulthood. We will never have true equality between the sexes unless we remember to treat boys with the same ability to choose their toys and interests as girls.

Spring Clean

Spring Cleaning is in full effect.  I’m tackling the reorganizing and big clean I do a couple of times a year.  Hopefully I can get through the kids rooms and actually remove some of the junk and toys they no longer play with.  It never fails a toy that hasn’t been played with in between big cleans is suddenly the funnest best toy that I can’t possibly give away.

If I give in to the pleas of “no I’ll play with it” I will find the same situation repeated a few months from now.  The toy in question will have been played with the day I threatened to give it away but will have simply collected dust in the back of the closet afterwards.  

I usually try to clean out the girls rooms when they aren’t around so I can avoid this scene.  Things I have gotten rid of while they aren’t home stay gone and are never even mentioned. I’ve yet to have either of them question me about what happened to a toy that has disappeared this way. It was forgotten by them long before I took it from the house.

My oldest is beginning to get a little cranky about entrance to her room and it is showing in the disorganization that comes with being a pre-teen.  I know in the years to come her privacy is going to become more and more important to her and I’m not sure how I will handle the inevitable mess. I am honestly not trying to snoop or invade her privacy I really just want to clean.

There is one toy that I’m hoping to get rid of this time around.  It is a ball roller coaster that my youngest received as a birthday gift for her 3^rd birthday.  It has never been a regularly used toy and takes up a ton of space.  It has survived through so many big clean ups simply because it is such a large toy and very easily missed. It has made it to the trash pile several times over but never actually gone.  The time for it to go is here and regardless of pleas to the contrary it will find its way to the donations bin, if I can just find a bag big enough to contain all its pieces.