I am the type of person who when sitting in a busy restaurant with an empty cup in front of me and unable to get the wait staffs attention will simply get up grab the coffee carafe and fill my own cup and several others along the way.
I don’t do it because I’m irritated or impatient it’s simply that I can and so I do. I am physically unable to restrain myself from doing something that in my mind I feel helps someone out. I’ve been told that perhaps I shouldn’t do that in restaurants and it has occurred to me they may be right.
I was thinking about this last night after my nephew’s grad party as I had at one point ended up wondering if I was overstepping my bounds and was doing more than I should have.
It did turn out that my help was greatly appreciated and I hadn’t actually stepped on any ones toes nor do I think I’ve ever actually caused anyone grief by helping out but it made me think about the coffee thing.
My sister-in-law did an absolutely amazing job of bringing everything together last night and had obviously worked very hard to make it a special night for her son.
I figured she deserved to have the time to enjoy what I imagine was hours upon hours of work so I started doing little things so she could be a good hostess, greet guests and enjoy the night she had planned so well.
At some point I realized that I seemed to have taken over and had become the designated head of the kitchen. I had others asking me what should be done or how to set things up and how they could help and I started to worry that I’d taken over a little too much.
I am an organizer by nature and many a friend or family member can attest that I always seem to be doing something and never hesitate to lend a helping hand. While hosting an event it often happens that they will realize there is something they needed to get done turn around to do it and discover I’ve already done it.
I did finally stop and mention to her that I seemed to have taken over and she seemed grateful for the help so I just went with it. By the end of the night I had barely sat down and my new “comfy” heels were no longer quite so comfy. I honestly had a better time having helped out than if I had stayed on the dance floor or chatted all night, although I did also do my fair share of those things.
I know the amount of work that goes into making these kind of nights special and I am always grateful for those who have become my helping hands. Whether receiving or giving help it is that contribution in and of itself that makes a night memorable for me.
So next time my cups empty at a restaurant I’ll still be more than happy to get my own re-fill.
