This past weekend while on my second or third stop to pick up a missed item from the store I witnessed a truly disheartening scene. While I was picking up a carton of eggs a little boy of no more than 5 was told by his father to grab a carton for him.
Being a 5 year old boy he fumbled and dropped the carton, his father’s reaction was absolutely shocking and vile. He began to tell this young boy that he was an idiot and worthless and that he would never do anything right. I was shocked by the hatred and anger in this man’s voice so startled in fact that although I would have liked to have said something I physically couldn’t speak.
This in and of itself is a terrible thing to hear a parent tell their child but it was the look on this little boys face that crushed me as his father continued to berate him. He’d heard these words before, he didn’t cry, he didn’t offer a single complaint just stood there and accepted what he seemed to believe was his due. My heart broke for this poor boy and it’s been in my mind ever since.
Even more than saying something to this father I wish I could have taken that little boy and told him that he is a wonderful and unique person just as special as anyone else in this world. I wanted to take that deadened look in his eyes and replace it with the happiness that all children deserve.
I wanted to shake this father and make him see what he is doing to his son. Children will believe what you say to them whether or not it is said out of anger or not. As a parent you have the power to shape how your child feels about themselves right from day one. How you react to accidents and in moments of stress will not affect just that moment but the rest of your child’s life.
I realize chances are had I said something he would have looked at me as the offending party and still not recognized what he was doing to his child. Often we can’t see what we are doing wrong and we don’t recognize the power of our words and our actions. I can only hope he realizes the power he holds to make his sons life better or worse before it’s too late.
For me what I will try to take from this is a reminder to be kind to my children. To love them no matter what they do and to always remember the power my words hold over them.
